Thursday, August 4, 2011

Please send 300 swamp monsters doing the Cha-Cha while riding pink Segways and juggling penguins

After sending hundreds of documents to the New Zealand immigration office, our visas have finally arrived!! And we're not getting deported after all!!!  It’s like little elves just showed up and brought Christmas early.
The visa process went something like this:
Immigration:  Please send an original copy of your marriage license signed in blood, gilded in gold, and hand delivered by a fairy riding a flying white pony.
Us:   Umm ok...
Immigration:   That is the wrong kind of flying white pony.
Us:  You didn’t specify.
Immigration:  It was implied.  Please start over.
Immigration:  Please send your first born child dressed as a kangaroo, riding a llama, and holding the original Declaration of Independence.  
Us:  We don’t have a first born child.  
Immigration:  Please try harder.
Immigration:  Please send 3 pictures of you holding oompa loompas while riding a ferris wheel with Bigfoot in Antarctica.
Us:  Umm what....
Immigration:  Please send by tomorrow.  AM.
Us:  We don’t know any oompa loompas.
Immigration:  You know oompa loompas.
Us:   Umm, pretty sure we don’t.
Immigration:   You don’t understand how this works, do you?
Us:   ... You’re not very nice, are you?
Immigration:   Please send...
Needless to say, we are excited that the process is over, and we are officially considered real people!  Or at least New Zealand residents.  (So now we can, you know, work and get paid and get health insurance - the little things in life).

- Meredith

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